Queer Secrets

[Text (In colors of transsexual pride flag): Part of me loves...

Sat, 25 May 2013 08:00:22 -0400

[Text (In colors of transsexual pride flag): Part of me loves knowing I’m going to transition, because it gives me a sense of freedom. I’m finally going to have the body I’ve always wanted. And then there’s the part of me that feels like a freak. The little voice in the back of my mind telling me I’m never going to be normal, and that no one will ever love me because of who I am. There’s a little part of me that wonders if this is the right choice, and wonders if I’m going to regret this decision forever. But then I remember how it felt when I bound my chest for the first time, and how right it felt when I saw how I looked in the mirror. I remember how right it feels to be called Oliver, and how proud I am when I see my pride flag. And I realize that this isn’t a decision I’m going to regret. This is a decision I’m going to remember as one of the best things I ever did.]

[Image description]: It’s been 6 months and hearing your...

Fri, 24 May 2013 16:00:33 -0400

[Image description]: It’s been 6 months and hearing your name still puts me in pain. I thought that I would be over you by now, but whenever someone brings you up, the memories rush back, and the pain stings like it was yesterday. The question that keeps haunting me is why. Why did you go? When did I become not good enough?

(Image of a CD, with a hand written title saying “It Is...

Fri, 24 May 2013 08:00:28 -0400

(Image of a CD, with a hand written title saying “It Is What It Is” Overlayed text says: I still listen to the playlist you made me, 4 years ago.)

[Cheshire cat with paragraph in green text: I’m in love...

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:00:38 -0400

[Cheshire cat with paragraph in green text: I’m in love with my best friend and I literally don’t know how to go about this again. I love her so much, and we flirt and we hold eachother when we’re together and she just means so much to me. Even if she doesn’t want anything more, I’ll always be hers and she can have me any way she wants. I just need some help…I need her. I need you, beautiful. I want you. Do you see it when I call you babygirl? When I call you beautiful? Do you just see it in my actions and my statements? Do you know? I need to know what you think…what you know…how you feel. Ugh. I love you. Do you see it when I hold you? Please, see it. Please. Please need me too.]

[Image Description: Rainbow 3D cubes/rectangle shapes with their...

Thu, 23 May 2013 08:00:28 -0400

[Image Description: Rainbow 3D cubes/rectangle shapes with their perspective lining up to the center of the image. Faint blue streaks come out from the center up toward the sides and top. A lesbian symbol, 2 women stick figures, glows above the center.]

[Left Side Type] I wish you were not married, especially to him. I know I would treat you better and actually give you the affection you deserve. Instead, I remain, watching as your marriage continues on shaky grounds. I can’t help feeling jealous some days, especially when he acts up and gets verbally abusive to you. I still love you, despite our relationship being over for good about a year ago. It HURTS. It still does. I mask it as best I can for you. I only concentrate on being your best caretaker and best friend.

[Right Side Type] I know you conditioned yourself to not see me in a romantic way anymore. You see me in a younger light, and I hope you get out of that. The scariest part is that I don’t know if anyone else would want to deal with me. I have a herniated disc in my back, dysthymia (depression), anxiety, migraines, heartburn… etc. I’m emotional and romantic. I dream of a woman that will love me for who I really am, just like she once did.

[Center Text] Where are you?

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Wed, 22 May 2013 16:00:27 -0400

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Wed, 22 May 2013 08:00:39 -0400

A cartoon laptop with caution tape around it. Bright read text...

Tue, 21 May 2013 16:00:37 -0400

A cartoon laptop with caution tape around it. Bright read text reads:
‘I fell in love with a girl I met online. She told me she was 17.
I’m 21, it wasn’t that big of an age difference. I was going to deal.
She lied.
She isn’t even legal. I’ve now broken everything we ever had off.
I feel so disgusted with myself.

More disgusted because these feelings for her won’t go away.’

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Tue, 21 May 2013 08:00:26 -0400

[Image: Two girls cuddling in bed. Text: Don’t pray for...

Mon, 20 May 2013 16:00:27 -0400

[Image: Two girls cuddling in bed. Text: Don’t pray for me. Don’t love me. Don’t even look at me. I’m not the person I pretend to be.]

[Text:I think I may be trying to convince myself that I like...

Mon, 20 May 2013 08:00:37 -0400

[Text:I think I may be trying to convince myself that I like men.]

[Image: Two girls snuggling. Text: We could be great together...

Sun, 19 May 2013 16:00:45 -0400

[Image: Two girls snuggling. Text: We could be great together and spend the rest of our lives together. But I want to make something of my future, and all you’re worried about is when the next time you get high is .

[Image: Two girls kissing. Text: I lied. I don’t want you...

Sun, 19 May 2013 08:00:20 -0400

[Image: Two girls kissing. Text: I lied. I don’t want you forever. I don’t even want you right know.]

[Image: Two girls entangled in each other. Text: I use you. And...

Sat, 18 May 2013 16:00:38 -0400

[Image: Two girls entangled in each other. Text: I use you. And you’re to dumb to notice.]

[image: car at night with headlights on. text: I was about to...

Sat, 18 May 2013 08:00:28 -0400

[image: car at night with headlights on. text: I was about to begin treatment when I met her. She’s a lesbian. She makes me happier than finally becoming myself just by smiling. I know what I’m doing is not fair but I want her more than my identity. She’s afraid of how desperate this is. I’m more scared than ever. The thought of losing her breaks me. All I want is a chance. I met the right person at the wrong time. It’s eating me alive.

Image description: A purple, white and green genderqueer flag,...

Fri, 17 May 2013 16:00:37 -0400

Image description: A purple, white and green genderqueer flag, with the words ‘It’s getting harder and harder to refer to myself as ‘she” on top of it.

[image: black text on a white background. text: “I’m...

Fri, 17 May 2013 08:00:37 -0400

[image: black text on a white background. text: “I’m trans* and I like to think of myself as an activist. I don’t even try to get my rapist’s pronouns right.”]

[Image: Rainbow with Mountains in the background, Text: “I...

Thu, 16 May 2013 16:00:27 -0400

[Image: Rainbow with Mountains in the background, Text: “I came out to my best friend as Polysexual. I knew he’d be supportive, but then he said “I feel weird being the only straight person in our group of friends”. I don’t know why, but that hurt so bad.”]

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Thu, 16 May 2013 08:00:18 -0400

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Wed, 15 May 2013 16:00:39 -0400